Week 13: Obedience
Weekly Chapters:
I Samuel 10-26
Passage of the Week:
I Samuel 15:22-23
Adjective:
1. State of being obedient
2. Willing to obey
3. Complying with or submissive to authority
Thesaurus:
· Acquiescence
· Orderliness
· Conformity
· Reference
· Deference
· Agreement
· Accordance
Father God,
As we go forward this week, give me the strength to stand up to my weakness, to call my bluff, and to recognize my disobedience when it rears its ugly head. God give me the strength to learn from Your word this week.
Amen
Authentic vulnerability:
Obedience is not my strong suit – never has been. I buck from it. Mischief, misbehavior, mutiny—I am the original mess. I was never raised to be obedient. I was a wild child from day one. I’m not sure if it was because my brother, the firstborn was such a willful child – full of wonder and awe with nothing deterring him. My brother would take apart TVs and doorknobs in the 1960s mind you, where the TV was not cheap. My sister was next—always wanting to please—then six years later came this little hellion with spit and vinegar for blood. Well, I am not sure what either parent did to deserve either my brother or me, they got us in full force.
Unfortunately, while they thought my brother must be an idiot as he never understood the word no (he later tested at a genius level on IQ test) I learned how to subtly change my behavior to what my dad thought was somewhat proper, never talking back only to raise Cain while his back was turned, always careful never to get caught. This chameleon lifestyle followed me into adulthood. Acting the part of who I was meant to be, publicly in compliance, secretly full of disobedience.
Sadly, I never learned how to comply with the rules and only acted the part. The issue with that is I grew older and my defiance came out. Here I am in my mid-40s refusing to act anymore. My boss says something I think is stupid and here I go telling him so. I’ll be darned if I keep my mouth shut. For 40+ years, I have kept my mouth shut.
As you see this is one emotion or behavior where I have the greatest weakness. Further with this disobedience comes my incredible bravado on the outside and major insecurity on the inside.
What is your Authentic Truth?
Study:
Saul, Saul, Saul, what are you doing? You had it all. You were the first king of Israel – you had it all. Saul had the full support of God and Samuel, he had riches, the adoration of the people. All—he had it all. I see so much of Saul in me. Do you?
Saul was on his way and he wanted to do the right thing. We’ve all been there. We are so excited that we jump the gun, we do things that maybe we shouldn’t, we don’t wait for God. God tells us to hold on, God put in place obstacles so that we do not move forward against his will, God does not deliver what we want. We ignore it and we keep going.
In I Samuel 13:7-14 Saul was to wait for Samuel. Wait, do nothing, just wait. So he waited, and waited, and could wait no longer. He performed Samuel's job of completing a sacrifice.
Saul wanted to go into battle. He wanted to do God's work. He was excited. But alas, he did not do what he was commanded. He let his will and desire come before God’s will and desire. Been there, often.
Sometimes we even think we are doing the right thing. Yet, because we are not waiting for God we are moving away from his will.
This will not be the first time Saul disobeys. As Saul moves forward in his career as King we see his bravado increase, he is more secure in his position and he feels very confident in this position.
I Samuel 15:1-9 we see Saul deliberately disobeying God‘s command. Through Samuel, Saul is given specific instructions: kill all the Amalekites, their king, people, livestock, etc. We see Saul conquer the people but keep the king alive and what Saul claims is good livestock.
So, again, excited wanting to do what he thinks is right, Saul deliberately disobeyed God. Saul knows what he needs to do, he was given clear instructions, yet he thinks he knows best. He disobeys God.
I have been Saul. I disobeyed my parents, law-enforcement (hello speeding tickets), my boss, and yes God.
And I can say that I have deliberately disobeyed.
Yes, I knew what my parents expected of me as a child and teenager.
Yes, I knew the speed limit and thought I knew better when my foot was on the pedal.
Yes, I knew I was disobeying my boss when I decided to move forward and ask forgiveness later.
Yes, I knew I was disobeying God when I decided to watch trash TV rather than read my Bible.
These of course are only small examples – there are many more with my disobedient nature. And understanding why I am disobedient is what I need to discover.
Knowing when we disobey is one thing knowing why is where the power starts.
Why we disobey:
1. We disobey as a result of testing limits
2. We disobey as a thumbs down to authority--willfully.
3. We disobey when we think we know best and follow our direction rather than the directions over us.
There are many other reasons too. The Israelites disobeyed as they complained in the wilderness second-guessing God’s vision for their lives and wishing they could go back into slavery.
Saul disobeyed out of insecurity. I get Saul, I have been Saul. The insecurity is flamed by anxiety in how others perceive us. We layout this vision of perfection and when something threatens to break the mirror we keep shining to perfection, we get scared that our image will crack. The image we built up of ourselves.
Saul was king, in his mind he was the ultimate ruler. But God was angry with him and said that he regretted making Saul king. Saul continued to disobey because of his insecurity and wanting others to worship him. He kept going further down the rabbit hole to prove himself. He even refused to see his family as pride clouded vision. Ego, pride, and insecurity =sin.
Yes, I’ve been there.
Father God,
This is a large struggle in my life, my area of greatest pain to myself and others. Sin takes over my life, engulfs it into a life that I do not recognize. Father God, let me find my self-worth in You and let me trust in You, Lord. Give me the courage to know that You alone are my redeemer. Thank You, Lord, I love You.
Amen.
Homework:
Look deeply at your life, your sin. Ask yourself the five whys and get deep.
Example:
Action: I told someone at work confidential information
Why: I wanted to share first
Why: I want to be revered even for a second
Why: my self-worth is poor
Why: because I am putting my trust in myself and not in God or I put it in people.
